A Series of Unfortunate Events

One simple act; that’s all is started out as.  Taking the dog to the dog wash. A new to us location; it had several factors that made it inviting to check out. Then again, if you think about our fur baby, you realize that this is not a “simple act”.

He is 50 pounds of pure muscle packed into a body that doesn’t even come up to your knees.  We don’t know much about his past life as we adopted him;we  do know that he is deaf. If you can picture Autism in a dog…..this is our Boss.

He loves car rides!  Show him keys and an open door, he’s ready to go.  If we had the Jetson’s car with a 360 degree window, he would be in love and I would not feel so pounced on.  You must, MUST have windows down!  You will have him on a leash as well, for his safety and your peace of mind.

That may be your only peace, after that he is a bundle of energy that wants to check anything, everything, and everyone out.  If you are the one holding the leash, you now have a task that resembles stopping a runaway horse while sitting still.

My oldest Aspie son was driving; he will be the first to admit that he is topographically challenged.  His girlfriend was sitting in the passenger seat. She is also challenged in this same way. If they ever go on a road trip together, there will be hourly check ins along with tracking. LOL

I volunteered to sit in the back seat of my son’s 4 door Ford Focus with the dog, the leash, the windows. A soda cup from earlier was left in the cupholder plus my phone was charging up front. I thought we were prepared.

We were not even out of the driveway and Boss was already scoping everything out.  First the back window, then both back seat windows, now to the front.  He stepped on my phone without an issue but M was worried what his weight would do if he stepped on it again.  So he moved to the soda cup, asking if I’d want it.  He noticed after that, Boss had poked hole in it.  The answer became a definite no.  Now, remember, I am the wrestling with the 50 pounds of mass joyfully promenading around waving his jowls at any driver that passes us on either side of the car. I cannot see the front seat, especially in the dark.

It was not until 15 minutes later, halfway to or destination, that M’s girlfriend realized my phone was “wet”.  That, my dear people, was an understatement.  Remember that empty soda cup?  Yes, you have it right.  It became empty once the hole was created and all that glorious liquid poured itself into the newly formed Ford Reservoir where it was held safely by the preformed rubber walls.

Ahhh….it died a glorious death.  Well…maybe not totally.  We were able to resurrect it enough (thankully) to get all information off and do factory reset before sending it back.  My plus to all of this is that the replacement thru Asurion was actually an upgrade.

Dog is clean; so is the cupholder.  Phone is replaced and we’re back to our definition of normal……whatever that may be.  LOL


It’s a Wrap

I thought that I would start this out with a recent story where I ended up shaking my head as I held it low….for I was the one that had made the mistake.  

At a recent trip to the bowling alley, I decided that I wasn’t that hungry. I already had my drink and I didn’t want the french fries. I just wanted the main part of the combo. The “combo” was the
Ham & Cheese Wrap. Note the word “wrap”…very vital word.  

In building independence and social skills, I will often write down our order and send it with one of the boys.

This time it was M’s turn. He had already begged me to go with him, to “help” of course.   “M…everything’s written down. She knows what to do. It’s not a problem.” So I send him back off.  

Okay…at this point, I should interject what my part of the order looked like.

Ham & Cheese Wrap (Sandwich Only)

Now, for those of you that have that unique talent, you will already see the error of my ways. I, on the other hand, had to be “told” by my oldest. So you can imagine that he came back to the table I was at and stated, “See! I told you should have come up there with me! Now she’s confused!”

“How can she be confused? It’s a simple order?”

“I can’t figure out how to explain this to her. How do I explain how to make a wrap into a sandwich?”

“What are you talking about?!?”

As the words came out of my mouth, the paper was being handed back to me and the meaning was becoming clear. I had written down the wrong word.

Cardinal rule of Asperger’s is that they are concrete thinkers. You do NOT throw in abstract thought without proper and sometimes extensive training.

Now, to we mere mortals, the above order my seem simple….to a trained Aspie, it is utter nonsense (on our part). So, as my son handed me the note, the imaginary hand slapped the imaginary forehead in the, oh so familiar, “Doh!” pose. Outwardly, I could not help but to chuckle….not at him, but myself.

It was my error for writing it the way I had. I immediately took pen to paper and made the following correction….

Ham & Cheese Wrap (Sandwich Only) Wrap

Correction made. Planets are back in alignment.

My son now looks at me and states, very clearly, “Why didn’t you say so to begin with?” Nuff said.

You can’t add to that….but with more laughter at the mere mortal’s mistake.